Our families are one of our greatest gifts from God. I can remember wanting to be a mommy even as a little girl. My husband, daughter, and son are truly the center of my universe.
Unfortunately, I haven’t been showing them their immeasurable importance lately. Over the last couple of years, as I’ve found my place in this fun and inviting online world, my people haven’t received the full attention they deserve. I seem to find a screen in front of my face far too often, even in the midst of a conversation with one of them.
When my kids were younger, I threw my entire life focus into them. They needed me and I was determined to fulfill my mommy duties. As they grow older, our relationships are evolving, but I’m learning there are still very specific needs each of them have that only I can meet.
My daughter will turn 22 next month and is determined to see the world. As she searches for her next career opportunity, I have no doubt a far away school is in her near future. I want to spend every moment in her presence, completely present, while I await her next move. It will definitely be much farther than the 20 minute drive currently between us.
My 13-year-old son is right on the verge of that hostile hormonal takeover all of us mommies dread. I need to soak up every last cuddle and hug I can get from him. He still loves to talk to me and get advice. I want to encourage this to continue without any iPhone distractions.
Regardless of age, our kids crave our attention. Our husbands need it as well. This online, distracted life we live changes our entire family dynamic.
So 2016 will be a year of family for me. I love the one word theme concept because it doesn’t involve a lot of concrete goals. It’s just an area that really needs focus.
I’m not sure what this will look like yet. Hopefully more home cooked dinners, weekends away, and daily office hours to completely free up my evenings. I’m not setting anything in stone. I’ll let God and my people’s needs lead me.
My life verse for 2016 will be this:
She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
“Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”
~Proverbs 31:27-29
What a breathtaking way for our husbands and children to perceive us…
My 2015 Health focus will carry over to this year as well. We cannot serve anyone if our bodies are struggling. After my husband’s recent health scare, his well-being is also at the top of my priority list.
Our families deserve our undivided attention. We are the only ones that can serve as the wife and mom which are incredibly important roles in our households. Let’s love big this year!
Well said. What a great post and a point well made.
God bless you and yours.
Thank you, Victor! Many blessings to you and yours as well :).
Dear Candace,
what a marvelous reminder to keep our priorities straight. So often I do place my most beloved on the background as I pursue other goals. At the end of the day, however, nothing matters as much as our relationships. First, our relationship with Christ. From that one, all others derive…our husbands, children on and on down the line…may 2016 be, indeed, the year of FAMILY! Thank you again for your words.
All other relationships really do derive from what we have with Christ. I completely agree, Gisela. My priorities have been so out of whack lately. I’m looking forward to slipping my top ones back in the proper place. Blessings, my friend!
Hi Candace! I love your wide-open, be available emphasis on your family. Each day brings its own opportunities, doesn’t it … and it sounds like you’re ready to grab hold of each gift. Thanks for sharing such a lovely picture … it’s so good to see you all together.
You’re so wise to cherish this fleeting season, friend … so very wise. And you’re living the Proverbs 31 woman in 2016. Cool.
{hugs!}
Each day absolutely brings something new, Linda. I’m such a planner that I tend to miss out on a lot of those opportunities when they sporadically arise. I’m looking forward to enjoying them much more this year. Hugs to you, my friend.
Candace,
Friend I agree whole heartedly. As a person who is a ministry leader in my church, speaker, mentor to many women, blogger, and on and on, I recognize that my family is my 1st ministry. I have established parameters to ensure that outside distractions don’t detract from family time. I have time allotted for ministry, blogging, & social media. I do not what TV. I rarely scroll my social media feeds. God told me long ago there is limited time to consume (via social media) I need you to produce. So your plan to establish parameters sounds great and has worked successfully for me. Blessing to you friend as you seek to honor God with your time.
You always inspire me, Tyra. You have a lot on your plate, my friend. I must admit to watching too much TV at night. I want to cut back on that as well and actually have conversations with my people instead of just sitting with them, staring at the TV :). Social Media is definitely an area I will also be cutting back on. It’s too easy to get sucked in for large chunks of time. Thank you for your encouragement!
I know! I so need to do better here. Sometimes blogging just needs to be put away and my family focus renewed. Thank you the lovely reminder my friend.
P.S. That family photo is fabulous!
Thanks, Jen! We had family pictures done in Hawaii this summer. I think the last ones were when my son was a baby :). I think a lot of us bloggers could use some help in this area. It’s really a tough job to balance. I’m feeling hopeful though!
I know exactly what you mean about screen time taking over family time. I love your theme 2016. I also hope to find greater balance in 2016. I hope you have a great year with your family 🙂
Balance is so hard for me, Sonya. I’ve always struggled with it, but blogging has put that struggle at an all time high. I’m looking forward to putting my people first this year. I hope you and your beautiful family have a wonderful 2016 together as well!
Such a beautiful goal, Candace. I admire your devotion to your husband and children. I think no matter how old our kids or grandkids get, they need us to be present, undistracted by social media or TV. To really show them they are so much more important. May God help us to focus on what’s most important! God first and then our family.
“To really show them they are so much more important.” Amen, sister :). This is my goal, Trudy. May God help us all with this. Thanks for the encouragement, my friend!
I love how you call us to love big! Every moment should focus on that with those we cherish the most. Focusing on family is a beautiful thing to do and I know you will do it well, my friend!
God will lead you as you trust Him to show you daily how caring for your family should look. I can’t wait to check in to see how it is going. Love and hugs!
Thanks so much, Mary. I’m feeling really good about this decision and looking forward to where God leads my family this year. I’ll definitely keep you updated, my friend :). Love and hugs to you!
What a great post to remind us of what’s really important. Yes, it’s far too easy to take our focus off the people right in front of us, thanks to the Internet. People are interacting more through Facebook and face to face and that isn’t a good thing.
The Internet can be quite a beast, Stephanie. It’s wonderful in some areas and detrimental in others. I’m excited about this commitment to my family this year (and beyond, of course). I took a lot of Facebook breaks last year and really enjoyed them. That will definitely carry over to 2016 as well :).
I could’t love this post- and your word, more my friend. Good for YOU for embracing these valuable fleeting moments with your precious kids and husband and honoring that incredible verse with your choices. I too, want my family to see me in this way!
That verse literally takes my breath away.
You’ve inspired me to do the same. Thank you for this reminder, dear friend. I need it often.
Thank you, my sweet friend. Those moments really are so fleeting. I couldn’t agree more, Chris. Cheers to loving our people big in 2016 :).
A year of family sounds wonderful! Family is really all you need 🙂
You are so right, Akaleistar. They truly are. I’m looking forward to spending more time with them :).
Hi Candace! I think stressing the importance of family is a wonderful theme for the year. I love the way you phrased the changes to come with your son. So true!
Your family is so beautiful, thank you for sharing that photo with us. Balancing time is always tough, especially with children in the house. Being on-line and writing and dedicating time to talents is always a challenge. I hope that you will find the grace to discover your ‘happy place’. I know you’ll never regret this time, or finding your balance either.
Blessings,
Ceil
Thanks so much for the encouragement, Ceil. Balance is not something I excel at :). I so agree that this time will not be regretted. Blessings to you, my friend!
Candace, Such an interesting age we live in. The world at our fingertips while reality lurks in the fringes. I agree time to turn that upside down and live in the now!
It really is an interesting age, Kathleen. Technology has brought a lot of wonderful advances, yet it has regressed us in many ways as well. I’m definitely looking forward to living in the now for a while.
Thanks for posting. I have really tried to limit screen time and be more present. That is my motto for 2016-be more present!
That is a fantastic motto, Carrie. I can’t imagine ever regretting living that way :).
I love this Candace and I think this is a vital focus. I’ve been working hard to determine a schedule that will separate blog life from family life. I want to be “there” for my kids. I don’t want them to look back at my blog and be like, “Mom really DID love us.” I want them to know it to their core because I’ve created and lived the memories with them… full on and engaged. This is one of the components of my parenting resolution.
Thanks for sharing (and for linking up to the #SHINEbloghop.
Wishing you a lovely day.
xoxo
What a beautiful resolution, Jennifer. I’m looking forward to joining you in this important venture with our kids. That is such a touching thought of them looking back on our blogs and realizing how much we truly loved them. Very thought provoking! Thanks so much for the party and stopping by :).
Beautiful family, Candace.
It seems easy to stay focused on my family when I’m busy changing diapers every couple of hours, but the truth is that even in this season there are many other sources vying for my attention. Thanks for the reminder to put family first!
Thank you, Shannon. I do adore them :). I agree that every season of parenthood still brings so many distractions, even the extremely hands on years. It has been a great number of years since I have changed a diaper. I’m not sure I still know how!
Dear Candace,
Exactly what I needed to hear this morning. I find myself, too often, sitting in my favorite corner on the couch, armed with my iPad, iPhone, and a cup of coffee, intending just to check a few things before starting my duties as a housewife, but before I know it, hours have passed and getting off the couch becomes a struggle. I am copying the verse you mentioned, especially the first lines, and pasting them in bold letters to remind me that my husband and our home, my children and grandchildren, come before Facebook, email, and mindless video games. I enjoy crafting, and scrapbooking, but fell into a habit of just pinning (Pinterest) and less doing…time to let God change this area of my life in 2016.
I enjoy you blog. It is so well written. Thanks for sharing 🙂
Hi René! It’s so good to see you :). I’m working on a frame to post that verse in so I’ll see it every day. I can so relate to too much pinning and not enough doing. One of my favorite memes I saw on Pinterest is a woman on the phone with her husband. She tells him he needs to pick up pizza on his way home because she’s been too busy pinning recipes to make dinner. It’s hilarious, but sadly incredibly relatable. Thanks for your encouragement, my friend!
May we not lose sight of what really matters because we’re too engrossed in our screens.
Thanks for the reminder.
Perfectly stated, Lux! I’m still a work in progress with this, but hoping to make great strides this year :).