My dear husband calls me his little “half-empty” wife. This wonderful pet name stems from my incredible ability to see the negative in everything. He, on the other hand, is extremely “half-full” in every sense of the phrase.
I’ve often wondered what causes people to be at extreme opposite ends of the spectrum in this important area. One of our big differences is the fact that my husband has always known Christ, even as a small child. I truly believe his deep faith and knowledge of the Word keeps his thoughts naturally anchored in the positive.
I spent most of my life as an unbeliever. Only in the past several years have I come to not only want to know Christ more, but to follow Him in the way He has instructed us. And I’m learning that following His Word can help me take those negative thoughts captive — and find real freedom in the process.
A few months ago, I went through a Bible study called the Hem of His Garment. One of the most powerful things we learned was how to use Philippians 4:8 as a filter for every thought that tried to take hold:
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”
We decided to turn “Philippians 4:8” from a noun into a verb. Instead of just reading the verse, we would actually Philippians 4:8 every negative thought that crossed our minds.
Is the thought true? Noble? Right? Pure? Lovely? Admirable? Excellent? Praiseworthy?
It feels like a long list at first. But when you start running your thoughts through it, something shifts. I’ll be honest — I quickly realized just how many of my thoughts didn’t make it past the first question. That was uncomfortable to sit with. But it was also the beginning of something.
Here’s what I’ve come to understand: telling ourselves only what is excellent or praiseworthy doesn’t just change our thinking. It changes our lives.
Being a negative person is exhausting in a way that’s hard to explain to someone who hasn’t lived it. My untrue, unlovely thoughts used to make me physically tired. I spent years looking for answers — doctors, diagnoses, something I could just take a pill for — and never found what I was really looking for on that path.
What I found instead was this: Philippians 4:8 creates the path to peace. Christ is the only way to true freedom.
Until I started accepting those two simple but powerful truths, my mind stayed trapped. I kept living the half-empty life I’d always known — full of thoughts that made me feel less than, unworthy, and deeply anxious. None of that is what God wants for us. None of it is what He says is true about us.
This is still a work in progress for me. Negativity is a hard habit to break, and I won’t pretend otherwise. But I genuinely believe this verse can move us — even the most deeply half-empty among us — toward the other side. I may never be at my husband’s level, and that’s okay. Progress, not perfection.
Here’s my challenge to you:
Philippians 4:8 the next negative thought that forces its way into your mind. It might be self-condemnation, a harsh thought about someone you love, or just the quiet background noise of feeling like you’re not enough. Whatever it is — run it through the filter.
Try keeping a journal and tracking the thoughts that come up most often. Write down each one, then create a column beside it for the true version — the one that actually holds up against what is noble, right, pure, and praiseworthy. Those rewritten thoughts are the ones worth keeping. Those are the words we want to start telling ourselves.
The Bible has withstood the test of time for a reason. The answers we’re looking for are already there, waiting for us on its pages.
I’d love to hear from you — are there any recurring thoughts you were able to rewrite? Leave a comment below and let’s talk about it.
This post is part of the Body Mind Soul Essentials archive — written from the middle of my own healing journey. The struggles I shared here shaped me deeply, and they’re part of why I created what I now offer.
If negative thoughts, anxiety, or spiritual exhaustion feel familiar to you, you’re in the right place. I’d love to invite you to take one small step.
A quick note: I originally wrote this as a guest post for Arabah Joy’s site, which is no longer available. I’ve included my full post here, though older comments may refer to the original version. You can now find AJ on Substack at One Magnificent Life.
Absolutely beautiful message. Powerful column, Candace….thanks too for introducing me to Arabah Joy. I subscribed while there…….what a wonderful site!
you have a way with words! I definitely needed this today…any day, really.
Thanks so much, Chris! I’m glad these words could serve you today, my friend. Arabah is wonderful. I actually met her through a Christian blogging class she created. I’m honored to be contributing monthly to her beautiful site. You will gain a lot through her posts :).
HA! My husband calls me Eeyore! I like your name better! I guess we both need to read more of the Apostle Paul to get our hearts into Half Full Mode (or Tigger mode!).
I’ve definitely been called Eeyore more than once as well, Michele :). And my husband is a true Tigger. Paul has given us some perfect words of wisdom on this topic. I should really post this verse throughout my home!
I’ll be over in a minute to finish reading this. I’m half-empty, too. Trying to reform!
Please drop by and say hello!
ஐღLauraღஐ
Harvest Lane Cottage
…doing what I can with what I’ve got where I am
on a short shoestring budget!
~~~~~
There are a lot of us “half-empty” people out there, Laura. I’m definitely a work in progress with this as well :). So nice to meet you!
This is timely for me, Candace. My mind is tormented today with lies of self-condemnation. Sometimes just when I think it’s going better, I go plunk. Three words here give me such encouragement – “Progress, not perfection…” Thank you. Blessings and hugs to you!
I’m so sorry you were struggling yesterday, Trudy. I hope you are feeling better and basking in truth today, my friend. “Progress, not perfection” has been truly life changing for me. Try posting it around your house to never forget :).
Good thought!! I am also a half empty person and have to push myself to look on the brighter side and I’ve been a Christian since I was 10 I believe. We need to be more positive and understand that God puts us through a situation so we can grow.
Amen to the growth, Miranda. I completely agree. It may be hard to see when we are in the middle of a struggle, but those have been my greatest lessons. Thanks for that reminder!
Oh my goodness, I love this. I’ve just been talking to my tween about this very approach: about taking thoughts captive and throwing them “in jail” and about replacing them with “whatever…”! In fact, she has adopted “whatever” as her catch-word to respond, mentally, to negative “stuff” at school. Which gladdens my mama’s heart so much. Thank you for sharing your words and heart…stopping by from the SHINE Blog Hop!
What a great tool your tween is already using, Elizabeth. I wish I would have tried taking thoughts captive at such a young age. She will be well ahead in her emotional wellbeing than most of us were :).
Heading over to read the rest of this. But I’m like your husband I try to think positive while my husband can be a bit pessimistic.
You seem like a really positive person, Sonya. I’m truly amazed by people who lean that way :). I have jumped to negative thoughts for as long as I can remember. This transformation is definitely a journey for me.
My husband and I are the total opposite of this; I’m definitely the optimist and he’s the pessimist (the realist, as he prefers to refer to it). I think there’s a place for both personalities, but the key is finding balance. Being too much of either one can have negative consequences.
I’d love for you to come link up with The Alder Collective link party! https://bit.ly/1LYB1Zn
I agree about finding balance, Abby. That’s probably why opposites work so well in relationships :). It seems like most of the couples I know have one of each. Thanks for the invite to your link party!
I have to keep that same verse in mind, along with Romans 12:2 And 2 Corinthians 10:5! Thanks for sharing!
Those are both great verses, Tina. Thanks so much for sharing them. All 3 of these verses together are an unstoppable tool for emotional wellbeing :).
This was wonderful – I left a more detailed comment on Arabah Joy’s site for you.
Thanks so much for sharing (and for linking up to the #SHINEbloghop).
Wishing you a lovely day!
xoxo
Thank you for the visits and linkup, Jennifer! I’ll see you over there :). I hope you’ve had a wonderful day as well.
Candace, I really needed this today! It’s so nice to hear I’m not alone in my “half-empty” world! Thank you!
You are definitely not alone, Leigh! There are an abundance of us in this category. I’m so glad this could help you today.
I am a half full women so when I do think half empty I know I am walking in the flesh. sometime though I can see not half empty or half full within a matter of minutes. How we see life really has to be sorted through our perspective of what we think our what the bible says. to gain a Godly perspective we must at all cost spend time with Him. Great post.
I couldn’t agree more with this, Betty: “we must at all cost spend time with Him.” That is the key. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts here.
Short but really encouraging. Straight to the truth. 🙂
Hi Lux! It’s actually much longer. The rest is at my friend, Arabah Joy’s site :).