I’ve been trapped in an ongoing battle with my health for years now. Many words and updates are scattered in this space as I’ve tried to honestly and whole heartedly share that struggle with you. Lately, my frustration in this area is overwhelming.
Poor health is such a vicious cycle. Making bad food choices inevitably leads to more sugary and processed choices. Not exercising leads to zapped energy which makes any movement completely undesirable.
So, that’s where I’m at right now, desperately trapped in horrible food choices, sidelined with complete and utter exhaustion. The study I just finished with Proverbs 31, What Happens When Women Walk In Faith by Lysa TerKeurst, could not have come at a better time.
The book teaches five important phases of faith we go through while in pursuit of a dream (p.9):
- Leaving. We must leave the old to gain a new level of faith.
- Famine. The phase where we lose our comfort zone and must depend even more on God.
- Believing. By fully experiencing God, we are able to believe in Him more than ever.
- Death. We can no longer make strides towards our dream on our own.
- Resurrection.
I love the way Lysa describes the Resurrection phase:
“In a way only He could, God makes your dream come true. Only then do you understand that real joy isn’t in the dream itself but rather in the richer faith you acquired along the way.”
Here’s where I find excitement through all of my crushing exhaustion. I’m in phase 4!
Over the past couple of years that I’ve been sharing my dream of beautifully optimal health here with you, my faith has grown exponentially. I can easily recount each of the above phases during that time period. The whole process began by leaving behind years of isolation and stepping out in faith to share my story here.
The Famine phase was a really tough one. I forced myself to show some of my darkest and most embarrassing moments in order to share the beauty of God’s grace through my testimony. This was so incredibly far out of my comfort zone. Telling those stories has gotten a little easier with time, but only through a great deal of trusting and dependence on God.
This leads seamlessly into believing. That trust and dependence has allowed me to experience God like never before. My health may not be where I want it. However, He is teaching me by making other dreams come true, like my long lived dream of writing, how real and able He actually is.
The Death phase with its ugly name, but beautiful pre-Resurrection placement, is where I’m stuck now. As frustrating as being stuck anywhere can be, knowing the light at the end of the tunnel is right around the corner really helps me breathe deep again.
We can’t do this on our own. If there was a quick fix or program that could make us healthy, I would most definitely know about it. I’ve tried them all over the years.
Next week, I’ll post a new Turning to Food update. I skipped last month’s. We will just chalk that up to me being knee deep in the death phase. I have a good feeling this week that things are going to be looking up! I would love for you to subscribe to my free newsletter and join me in this journey.
Do you have a dream you are working towards? What phase are you in right now?
Candace, I really appreciate this post and that you open up like you do. I honestly feel like I am at that point of really needing to make that change…but that death phase, although necessary, is a tough one. I have fought the food battle for many years now and it’s just become exhausting…physically and spiritually. Thanks for the encouragement! Your blog is really helping me…I was actually visiting last night to read your Daniel Plan post. Romans 6, 4-8 comes to mind…
It really is exhausting on so many levels, Karla! I feel your pain, my friend. This has been my greatest struggle. Getting sober from alcohol and drugs was actually easier! I’m a fan of the whole Daniel Plan program. I’m actually thinking of starting a support group for it. I would also love to do a 31-day series in October for people wanting to follow the plan. Thanks for the verses! They are perfect :).
Hi Candace! Isn’t great when you find a book that just speaks the truth to you? Like this author has been living with you for years!
I think I’m in that famine phase. I really have to learn to trust God more. Some days are better than others, but I want to grow into a giant faith in Christ, just as you have. That’s beautiful! I know its hard-won too.
The death phase sounds so hard and heavy, but isn’t that a place where I have to die to myself? I think so. All a part of unifying my desires to His. A work in progress for me, that’s for sure.
Monday blessings,
Ceil
It’s a work in progress for me as well, Ceil. Death can be such an ugly word, but we forget that is can also mean new life is just around the corner.
The famine phase is a tough one. My faith ebbs and flows more than it should. I completely understand. Praying you see your resurrection soon :)!
Phase 4! YAY! That means you’re moving forward, that there’s a light at the end of the tunnel, that victory is right ’round the bend!
Praise God! He’s giving that grace and energy to make right choices one at a time. The enemy hisses in the most evil taunting tones, making us feel like losers at every turn. I rebuke his efforts in your life and mine.
We belong to our Creator, and there’s nothing He can’t do. Keep going, girl!
;-}
Thanks for your much needed pep talk, Linda! The word loser has been pushed into my head many times by the enemy when thoughts of health arise. I got a new tattoo on my wrist last week that says ‘grace’ with a cross beside it. It’s helping me tremendously to fight off those unnecessary taunts.
Hello Candace, long time no see. Once again, I am so happy I came to visit you at your virtual home. It is always an uplifting and inspiring experience. Thank you for sharing the resource with us. The book does sound like a much needed addition to my summer reading list. Lord have mercy…discovering the phase I´m in at this point may be a bit of a shock…but a necessary one. God does bring the resources to us right when we needed. He is never late. Big hugs!
Hi Gisela! Hugs to you, my friend. It’s always great to have you here. I really liked this book and would highly recommend checking it out if you get a chance. It’s one of her first books I think, but definitely worth the read. You are so right: “He is never late.” I’m learning that one day at a time :).
It must be in the air, I feel soo sluggish and tired now too! I am like death warmed over three times! I like the stages detailed in this book, truthfully any big life changes cannot be done without belief and faith. Good luck my friend hopefully we can pull ourselves full circle!
It’s so hard to function from that place, Jen. I know that exercise helps tremendously with energy, but we need energy to exercise. It’s such a vicious cycle! I’ve done better the past couple of days. Writing it out here helped me as it always does :). I forced myself to go on a hike with my son yesterday. It was extremely helpful. Praying you are energized soon, my friend!
Friend,
I am here celebrating the journey with you. God is taking those dry bones and standing them up and putting new flesh on them. Like a phoenix rising out of the ashes, you rise in optimal health: mind, body and spirit. And I am here cheering you along the way. Celebrate each small victory knowing that Jesus convicts not condemns. If you drink water all day today, then score one for the team. If you eat a leafy green vegetable tomorrow, then score 2 for the team. If you eat a candy bar day 3, dust yourself off, forgive yourself and keep trying the rest of the day. Praying for you friend.
I so appreciate your advice and encouragement, Tyra. You are inspiring to me. I need to get better about celebrating the small victories. They are what keep us on the path and eventually add up to the big victories :).
Keep on keeping on, Candace. God is our strength and refuge. Remember: just three days from Good Friday ’til Resurrection morning…Jesus sits at the right hand of the Father advocating for us even now….May we feel His presence today. XO
Thank you for your sweet encouragement, Allie! It’s truly a beautiful thought how he advocates for us. I need to remember that! I seem to keep going back to trying to do things on my own which is so unnecessary and rarely successful :).
Yeah, you and me both. XO
Oh Candace…. I just love that you are always reaching and stretching your arms out to grow your faith and take those courageous steps toward healing and hope!! I ADORE Lysa… love every one of her books!! I’m so glad she is feeding you such spiritual nourishment while you are in your ‘death phase’…
Hold on girl!! Resurrection is coming!!! Cling to Him!! Ride on HIS wings!! By His Power…
She is one of my favorite authors too, Chris. This is one of her first books. I’ve read so many of hers that I always think when we begin one of her studies, I have nothing new to learn :). I’m always happily surprised at how wrong I was.
Thanks for the support and cheers, my friend!
Hi Candace! I love that book. In fact, I think it’s time I read it again! It’s definitely one of those that needs to be read over again, especially as we move into different phases of our journey. Thanks for the update here. Your struggles and honesty offer hope and healing for others. Blessings!
This is definitely a book to read more than once. I completely agree, Kristine. Blessings to you as well!
Candace- you inspire me every time you step out in faith. Your dreams, passions and authenticity spill upon this page and I love joining you in your journey. You and I have talked and have so many parallels in our lives. I am blessed to know you. Much love!
Thank you so much, Mary! I’m so blessed to know you as well, my friend. These food struggles are so difficult. I know you get it. It’s just so easy to turn to in those hard moments!
Thank you so much for sharing your vulnerability and experiences. They do indeed build our faith when we look them in the eye. Thank you for sharing!
They absolutely build our faith if we let them, Kaylie. Sometimes we have to get to a place of completely giving up to hand it all over to God. That’s pretty much where I’m at now :).
Getting healthy seems like such as easy thing to do, but it is so hard. I have weeks when I eat very little sugar. Then one treat ruins all my hard work. Because it’s never just one treat it always snowballs for me. But all we can do is keep trying and lean on God for help.
I nodded in unison all the way through your comment, Sonya! I agree wholeheartedly with every word. It’s so frustrating to do good for a while and one bad day can completely set me back to the beginning. We will not give up, my friend! God will certainly see us through :).
Candace, I just praise God for you sharing your honest struggle. Thank you for your realness. We all need and crave this. You speak to me girlfriend. Also, regarding the stages, my mind started to think that perhaps we could be in a couple of them at the same time. I wonder? Wonderful and thought-provoking post. You call my heart to step out. Thank you! Cheering you on wildly today from the #RaRalinkup with Purposeful Faith.
I wonder if we can be in more than one stage as well, Kelly. Many days I feel as if I’m in the Famine stage too. I’m so glad this spoke to you, my friend. Your cheers and encouragement are always greatly appreciated!
Candace, I think different parts of my life are at different stages and I appreciate your being open and honest. it means so much when we can do so. I empathize with your health struggles. I was diagnosed with CFS in 2005 and Celiac 2012. Sometimes, battling these have overwhelmed me and I, just like you, isolated. I’m doing more now, working on my God-sized dream and keeping my margins wider. I sometimes keep these struggles private because I don’t want to give them glory, but I agree with you, we need to share, be open, honest when the Lord gives us the green light, in order to grow and help others! Blessings and prayers!
I can totally relate to not wanting to give our struggles glory, Kathleen. I always second guess publishing these but as you said, I think it really helps others. We all want to feel understood and not so alone. I’m glad to hear you are working towards your God-sized dream! What a beautiful goal. Many blessings and prayers for you as well!
Thank you for sharing your journey with us Candace. I read Lysa’s book a while back and remembering very much liking it. As for my issues with food, I feel like I’m oh so close to the resurrection phase or actually in it. There are hard days but I am not falling to those old behaviors anymore.
Always blessed by what you share.
xoxo
I’m so looking forward to joining you in the resurrection phase, Beth! You are inspiring. I get in a place far too often of thinking this food issue will never be solved. Friends like you that are ahead on the path help me to stay hopeful. Thank you!
Candace, your honesty shines through. Challenges are real and we are really able to make a difference when we pull them out of the dark and into the light to examine and modify our actions. Love this Susan
Writing about our challenges is like free therapy, isn’t it? I have already done better with food and exercise this week after releasing these words. It’s truly amazing. Thanks, Susan!
Good stuff, Candace. That sounds like a good book. I’ve loved other stuff I’ve read from Lysa. Keep going, friend, you’re doing a good job. xoxo
Thanks, Kristin! I always get a lot from her books too. This is one of her first ones. I really enjoyed it. Keep an eye on the kindle version. I think it goes on sale sometimes :).
Have you read Lysa’s book Made to Crave? That is a good one that I have nto gotten all the way through but definitely made me feel like I was not alone in my eating struggles.
I loved that book, Shelly! I’ve actually read it a couple of times and I’m sure I’ll go through it again sometime :). It definitely helped me see how many of us struggle with this as well.
My food choices aren’t the worse, but not the best too. I am pretty much sticking to the 80/20 principle. Where I eat good 80% of the time. I love reading your challenges and sharing mine with you too. I will be stopping by often to your blog to keep me inspired in my faith and know that I am not alone in my struggles too.
I think the 80/20 plan is awesome, Tammy. I would never put pressure on myself to try to do good all the time. That always leads to major binging for me. I love visiting you as well, my friend!
I love how this shows the different stages. Even though the death stage could be discouraging, it is encouraging to see that you are on stage 4! Resurrection is right around the corner!
I never thought I would be excited to be in a stage called death, Tammy :). Knowing Resurrection follows makes all the difference!
I really appreciate how open you are about your struggles.
The 5 stages in pursuit of a dream provide some food for thought. It’s sometimes difficult to have good perspective when we are in the middle of it, but we do grow from these experiences. I must remind myself that this is often how God shapes us!
It is absolutely “how God shapes us,” Shannon! I completely agree. I’ve been so focused on the failures in my journey lately. I have to remember each one of those is a growth opportunity. Learning these 5 stages has helped a great deal.
I always find your words so inspiring! Thank you Candace! <3 Loved the title of that book. 🙂
Thanks, Paula! I loved that title as well. It definitely made me want to read it and learn more :).