Early Monday morning, I listened to Abby Rike, a previous contestant of the Biggest Loser, recall the moment she found out her husband, 5-year-old daughter, and 2-week-old son were killed in a car accident. I can not imagine surviving this tragedy, especially with the unwavering faith Abby held onto.
I want this type of faith. The kind that withstands the test of any circumstance, no matter how terrifying it may be.
Lysa TerKeurst’s book, Made to Crave, is teaching me the beauty of doing exactly that. Choosing Him above all else. She talks about carrying out Afternoon Acts of Kindness, where she fills that time “with His thoughts of love towards others.”
I was immediately reminded of one of my favorite quotes from Mother Teresa:
This, combined with Abby’s tragic story, convinced me to choose my precious family as the recipients of my afternoon acts of kindness.
I am not a cook. We eat out at least 5 to 6 times a week. I always have the best of intentions, but dinner time rolls around and we end up heading for the car.
This week has been different. I made a plan. Monday morning after I read my chapters and decided my family’s nourishment would be my afternoon priority, I headed to the grocery.
Meal planning truly makes all the difference. As Proverbs 21:5 wisely teaches, hurry and scurry just put us further behind. Taking some time every week to write out our nightly dinners and create a grocery list can trigger beautiful change in our homes.
I made dinner Monday and Tuesday night and have all the ingredients ready for Thursday and Friday. Tonight we ordered pizza. Progress, not perfection.
At the beginning of the week, our kitchen table was not even usable. It took some clearing of coats, purses, backpacks, books,… to be able to sit and eat there.
Our time this week around my grandmother’s old wooden table has been more than I could ever have imagined. These are precious moments. Unforgettable moments. My daughter will be 20 next week and before I know it, she will have a family of her own to feed at her kitchen table.
We still get to talk, laugh, and spend time together when we eat out, but it is different. I don’t know if it’s the satisfaction of preparing the food or the memories of my grandmother feeding me as a child at that same table, but the time in our kitchen is special. Extraordinarily special.
Eating out has been a strain on our finances and health. If we had the money from every meal out during this year alone, I’m sure we could take a nice vacation somewhere tropical. Our menu choices have been far from nutritious. Rarely has a vegetable appeared on any of our 4 plates.
I must confess my home-cooked meals include unhealthy processed foods like frozen garlic bread and white pasta, but there has been a fruit or vegetable on every plate. Having a plan has helped me trade in my 4pm snack binge for a moment of thanks as I begin preparing dinner as a daily afternoon act of kindness for the people I love most in the world. I receive far more than I give.
She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.”
~Proverbs 31:27-29
You’re such a beautiful person!!:)
Aww! Thanks Heather! I think the same of you :).
LOVE it! I never thought that cooking dinner for my family could be seen as my “afternoon act of kindness” That surely puts a different perspective on the whole ordeal. I AM NOT A COOK! I really grumble and complain every time I cook…that’s just NOT my thing…I’d rather be doing something else…did I say that I don’t like cooking? So this post has given me a way to cope with what I have seen as a nasty chore and transform my mind in a way that it becomes an act of love…wow! Praise God! Thank you so much!
It really does put such a different perspective on it, Gisela. I’m with you on not liking cooking! That’s why we eat out so much, but I can no longer deal with the financial and health effects. I’m glad this helped you! It has really been eye opening for me this week.
Thank you for sharing that perspective. I need to take more time to enjoy our moments around the table instead of hurrying through it and then the family disperses to separate parts of the house! What a great reminder on how this ordinary “task” can be an act of kindness and obedience! Gena (group 50)
It can be incredible quality time, Gena. I really focused on that this week, and was in no rush to get up from the table. It made a huge difference in the entire dinner experience :).
This is incredible Candace! I’ve read several blogs this morning taking about the RAOK & my mind went to my struggles with my step son & my thoughts were I need to send some of that his way. Love that you put that quote from Mother Theresa on here & LOVE the verse Proverbs 21:5 too. I am really proud of you for the changes you have made this week. I know that can be a tough habit to break. I always cook during the week but we ate out all weekend which was a nice break. When we started this study I decided we needed to stop doing that so much. & it has been hard. One thing that has helped me big time with cooking is planning ahead. On Friday I make my menu for the next week then usually Saturday head to the store. I just plan how many meals I will need & then every morning I look at that list & decide this is what we are having tonight. Keep on keeping on Candace you can do it!
Planning is key. I’m really going to try to continue working on that. It makes all the difference. I love that Mother Teresa quote! The Proverbs 21:5 verse was in the email for our monday morning call. I had never seen that version but it fit here so well. I think it is from the Message. Thanks for the encouragement and planning advice, Tonya! I really like your idea of planning friday and shopping saturday. I may try that :).
This is fabulous! <3
My husband and I both love to cook which DEF. HELPS the process…
Planning though is key!
You spend less at the store, and you have a plan to fall back on!
Loved reading!
Thanks, Amy! You are so blessed that you and your husband both enjoy cooking. I bet there are some wonderful meals made in your kitchen!
Awesome idea and so heartfelt. I am going to do this. Thank you.
Thank you, Sherise! I hope you have many successful family dinners in your near future :)!
Eating together at the dinner table is a precious bonding time. I actually cook most nights because we can’t afford to eat out. I hurt my wrist and couldn’t face cooking one-handed so we did take out and that was a real treat. We still sat at the table and remembered how fun McDonald’s can be!
It is precious time, Laura. I have really enjoyed it this week and hope to continue. You’re right, take out at the table is wonderful too. We loved pizza night :)! I hope your wrist is all healed up. That would be tough to cook with!
Beautiful share 🙂 I find meals which include fish and salads are quick and easy also eggplants and chicken lol!
I cook chicken a lot! I really need to branch out :). I’m planning to try more fish. It is so good for you. Thanks, Mari!
Beautiful, Candace!! You reminded me of so many good memories sitting around my grandmother’s table. Thank you! I’m so happy that you are creating those same kind of memories with your own family. I know how easy it is to get in the habit of just picking something up and how hard it is to break that habit! And I love the quote from Mother Teresa. Thanks again for being an inspiration!! 🙂
Thank you Kim! It really does become a habit. We just automatically ate out every night. I have always wanted to change that, and am feeling more empowered than ever with it right now. I hope I can keep it up!
This is a great discovery. I am so proud of your new journey. You can cook really good. I have tasted some of those delightful presentations! Keep it up!
“Really good” may be stretching it, but I have my moments :). Hopefully I will get to your level some day!
As always, I love the relevant verses you share!
Thanks Roaen! It’s always great to see you :)!
I love the way you interpreted the Proverbs for your “Random-Acts-Of-Kindness”. Have a great week ~ Miriam
Thank you, Miriam! I actually saw that in our Monday morning conference call outline. It really stood out to me. You have a great week as well!
I’m a terrible cook, but I love to bake. Sometimes I think that my husband eating dinners I cooked are his acts of kindness to me. Even if you have to pick something up, you can always make the effort to sit and eat it at the table. The time spent at the table isn’t any less valuable because you didn’t make the food yourself. Cut yourself some slack on busy nights.
I love your thought on his acts of kindness are eating your dinners! I feel the same about my husband. He never complains though. I agree that takeout at the table can be rewarding also. I will never be one who cooks every single night!
Well done Candace – this inspires me!
Thank you! So far, so good :)! I hope I can continue cooking at least 5 nights a week. That way I could enjoy a couple of nights out with no guilt.
Loved your blog. I came upon it through MTC Blog Hoppin and I’m glad I did. You are correct, time around the dinner table with our children is SPECIAL. They grow so fast and that time will never come back around. Have a blessed day!
I’m so glad you found your way here, Lisa! They do grow up so fast. I can’t believe how old mine are already. I hope to see you again :)!
Candace,
LOVED reading your post about your act(s) of kindness that started with you family.
Convicting( in a good way)
Thanks so much, Sherri! Family is so important. I have really enjoyed taking care of them in this way throughout the week.
The time spent around the table with family is absolutely invaluable. Keep up the good work.
It is invaluable, Sandy! I did really well last week and then my kitchen sink broke Friday. What a crazy time for that to happen, just when I was getting into the habit. There will probably be a lot of takeout this week until I can get a plumber here. I’m still planning to eat at our table though :)!
You’ve done an amazing job!!
Don’t belittle yourself for a second by saying that you’re not doing good enough because you have processed foods or whatnot – you’re cooking supper, you’re eating at home, you’re making memories with your family, THAT’s what counts. I grew up in the 80s/early 90s and my mom cooked the same thing basically every single night – hamburger, potatoes, and a vegetable. Every now and then, we’d have rice and hot dogs. What we ate wasn’t nearly as important as the fact that we sat down together every single night AND we weren’t spending $20 a pop at every meal.
Thanks for the encouragement. You are so right! It is the memories that count. I’m trying to find about 10 meals everyone can agree on. I can just rotate through them for awhile without having to overthink it. I grew up in the 80s as well and remember the typical meat, carb, and vegetable dinners. If I can manage that as many nights as possible, I’ll be satisfied :).
Funny that most beautiful memories I have is connected with food. Moments spent with loved ones shared over good food. This is an excellent post. As always!
Happy 2018, Candace! May you have a fruitful year ahead!
We have a lot of great memories as well around the dinner table, Lux. It can be such a wonderful way to end the day with our favorite people. Happy New Year and many blessings to you in 2018!
Mother Teresa is one of my inspirations too!
She left an incredible example and so many beautiful words of wisdom behind, Carol. A true inspiration!
I agree, taking a bit of time to plan can make such a difference to how we eat. I’m planning this week to look up some new healthy recipes to try. I also like your reminder to aim for progress, not perfection.
I’ve been a perfectionist for far too long, Lesley. I’m definitely aiming for progress in all areas these days. Perfectionism always leads to disappointment. I hope your healthy recipe search is successful!
Happy New Year, Candace! You had me at that wonderful 1950s image right up top! But it’s those ‘afternoon acts of kindness’ that pull me in, that offer me a gentle prompt, that make me think, ‘yes, I can do THAT.’
I’m grateful.
Happy New Year, Linda!! I love those 50s images. They’re so fun and nostalgic. Yes to the afternoon acts of kindness being attainable. Such a great and easy to follow through with concept from Lysa!
Happy New Year! I’m definitely in love with meal planning & even developed my own system several years ago. It’s a HUGE time saver- i even wrote about it yesterday (and have more planned for next week, ha!) Definitely Agreed it’s all about progress not perfection. Thanks so much for sharing at the #happynowlinkup!
Happy New Year, Leslie! I’ll definitely check out your system. I’m loving this new habit on so many levels. Some days it’s honestly just sandwiches but even that still makes me feel successful.
I love this! I love cooking for my family, and finding meals we can enjoy together. There really is something fulfilling about it. This year I am trying to go with less meat and dairy since once of my kiddos has some sensitives. Wish me luck! I applaud your effort and know it will pay off for all of you.
It really is so fulfilling on many levels, Jen. I completely agree. Good luck on your new less meat and dairy venture, my friend! There’s so many great resources out there for those types of issues these days. It’s amazing how much better we can follow those plans when theres a sensitivity in one of our precious babies :).