Do you remember that song from the Brady Bunch where Peter belts out lyrics about change in his cracking pubescent voice?
When it’s time to change,
you’ve got to rearrange
who you are and what you’re gonna be…
Those words are constantly singing in my head these days. I’m in the midst of big changes. Not puberty as Peter was so obviously dealing with. I’m far from those days.
My current life is quickly evolving from those mommy days where your kids are in constant neediness to learning how to build relationships in their teen and young adult years. This transition consists of beautiful, life-giving experiences, but it’s also a time of mourning.
I’m grieving the days of cuddles, childhood idealized thoughts that mommy could do no wrong, and quite honestly, naps. My daughter is living on her own now while we create separate lives that are thankfully still very much connected. My son has recently become a teenager as we await the fragmented speech pattern Peter Brady and all boys must suffer through as they turn into young men.
Even with a great deal of effort spent transitioning into these new relationships, most of my days are filled with learning who I am and what I’m going to be, just as Peter and his 5 siblings sang about all those years ago. I actually get to make choices about how I spend my time rather than the minutes being driven by small children tugging at me.
I’ve found a love of writing, using it as an outlet to share my testimony. My friendships are chosen carefully and have the time to blossom instead of relying on moments at children’s events and whoever happened to be in attendance. I can spend hours reading next to my son on the couch, each of us enjoying separate books.
These are the things we can look forward to with passing years. Time of our own. Transitioning, yet still incredibly love-fueled relationships. Quiet moments to read an entire chapter of our favorite book without interruption.
God gives us seasons in life. We have years dedicated to caretaking, whether the focus is small children, aging parents, or another loved one. There are seasons filled with change and learning our new place in the world. Some days are just meant for reflecting on our lives, learning from our mistakes, and remembering all the special moments of our pasts.
There are times I get weepy over seeing babies and knowing my next one will be years away and living with one of my grown children. Many hours have been spent looking in the mirror at a rapidly changing face and expanding midsection. Regardless of these things, I can find joy in the breathtaking, past and current, experiences of the wrinkling, widening woman staring back at me.
There are positives and negatives to each season of our life. We need to hold tight to the beauty of these moments and know any difficulties or associated sadness will soon be gone. This is how I’m choosing peace in this journey, flooding my thoughts with the joyful aspects of passing years and growing children.
So when you see those creases continue to deepen around your aging eyes, remember all the laughter and happy memories that put them there…
There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens