My life is stuffed full. During each second, in every corner, something is begging for my attention. I have definite hoarding tendencies in all areas of my life.
My house is stuffed with things. Over Christmas break last year, we took at least 6 truck loads of cast aside belongings to Good Will. Yet I still don’t have a proper place for everything I own.
My schedule is jam packed. If you look at my calendar, it’s really quite dizzying. The hours from 7am to 9pm are printed in it, and every line is filled with something. Things are even scrawled in the margins, as if those are extra available hours.
My stomach is always overstuffed. I eat until it’s painful at times, filling up every dark corner of my body. Food addiction replaced alcohol and drugs 15 years ago. It may be a better choice, but its overconsumption is still hurting me on so many levels.
The one place I do seem to have extra space is my lungs. I think there are whole days where I don’t fill them with even one strong, solid, deep breath. My husband says when he watches me sleep, it’s as if I’m panting.
I think this lack of still moments, open space, and deep breaths keeps me in a constant state of flurry. As I shared about my restlessness last week, I realized this is not the way I want to live my life. That feeling of being ungrounded is unnecessary and absolutely avoidable.
Here’s my advice to those of us with these tendencies to overfill every aspect of our lives:
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Start the day with God. This has helped me tremendously in the past 6 weeks. When I open my Bible as I first open my eyes, instead of email and social media, I breathe deeper. I immediately create a different day by focusing on Him rather than all of that outside noise.
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Leave food on your plate. For those of us forced to sit at a dining room table as a child, long after everyone else disappeared, pushing around cold food on our plates, this is a very tough one. We were told to clean our plates because there are starving children elsewhere.
I can assure you they aren’t going to get those leftovers. Leave some food on your plate and sponsor a sweet hungry child to make sure they are taken care of.
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Declutter one room. My mom tells me this all the time. I get so overwhelmed with all of the extra stuff in my house, I find myself incapable of even beginning the overhaul that needs to take place. For me, this may mean decluttering a drawer or cabinet first rather than the promise of a whole room.
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Just breathe… Stopping to pray throughout the day helps me in this area. I tie the two together. As I pray, I automatically take deep, cleansing breaths to focus and ground myself. Try making this a combination in your life. Drawing closer to God while increasing lung functioning is definitely a win-win.
This will not be an overnight fix. We have to work at creating these beautiful and necessary empty spaces. Let’s start somewhere today, even if it’s one small change.
Is there an area of your life that immediately jumps out at you? I would love to hear about it. Let’s chat…
Candace it is like you personally wrote this for me. My house is cluttered and I constantly feel overwhelmed. I need to get back to reading a devotional first thing in the morning. I also need to work on getting rid of the clutter in my life. I need to watch the tv show Hoarders because that always motivates me to throw things away…lol.
I also had to sit at the table as a child and eat all my food. Now I have a bad habit of cleaning my plate. I’ve been trying to stop my overeating my eating from smaller plates, but I still need to buy some smaller bowls.
Thanks so much for posting this today.
We are so alike, Sonya! I love the idea of smaller plates. Ours are huge. A lot of them have cracks, so I think I may invest in some new, smaller ones. Thanks for the idea! That show Hoarders has the opposite effect on me. It makes me feel like my house is spotless and perfect, because I don’t have animal feces and mold everywhere :). Starting the day with a devotional is one of the best things we can do. I’m still a work in progress with that one though.
I’m taking a bit of a break from decluttering right now … and your words are a sight for sore eyes, friend.
So wise you are.
How cool to deal with both the spiritual and the physical aspects of who we are since they surely go hand in hand.
Fabulous. You, Candace. And this post.
;-}
Thanks, Linda! They really do go hand in hand. I feel like I focus too much on the physical aspects, but worrying about the spiritual side first would save a lot of time and energy :). I’ve been on a decluttering break ever since the big shedding at Christmas. It’s time for me to start back up though.
guess you dont want the Christmas dishes I just dug out of my pantry and put in a pile to give you!! Or maybe you do!! Saved your breathe quote as my new screensaver!
Hugs, Nic
Let’s don’t get hasty, Sis! I should probably at least see them ;). I do love being your Good Will… Great idea to use that as your screensaver. It’s a perfect quote to see all day!
Inhale.
Exhale.
Inhale.
Exhale.
Thanks for the reminder to BREATHE, friend…just took a deep lung expanding breath, felt fabulous! Always blessed by your writing, thank you Candace.
I’m so glad you listened to this advice and took some time to breathe, Allie! It amazes me what a simple, life giving task this is, yet I so often overlook it. Maybe I need to post Inhale, Exhale throughout my house :).
I totally needed this reminder… all of them, but especially number four!! I just can’t help but be busy and if I get a free second I scramble to fill it up quickly. Thanks for sharing this <3
I’m really trying to make number 4 a habit, Rachel. It should be the most natural thing, but I have to be really intentional with it. I hope you find some breaks in your busyness :).
Candace I couldn’t have said this better! I am a firm believer in cutting down and cutting out. Sometimes we can’t cut some things, but the things we can that aren’t adding to our lives should definitely be cut. I took a design course once and the instructor said that the clutter in your house affects you and sometimes badly.
I have to work on the deep breathing though, it seems like that is something I just don’t do enough of. Thanks my friend for a brilliant post and a fabulous reminder. Hugs!
I think clutter affects us on so many levels, Jen. I remember the book that came out a while ago, called something like, Does this clutter make me look fat? I thought that was so eye opening and I can relate.
May you find time to breathe deeper, my friend :).
Oh Candace! It sounds like you do not stop at all!! I just couldn’t do it. I have slowed down so much in this year… just the thought of having something every hour of the day exhausts me.
I hope you can find the balance, my friend. Pace yourself as best you can. Deep DEEP breaths…. and prayer. God and air is really the two life givers… use them both! 🙂
I definitely don’t get it all done, Chris. I’m actually sometimes paralyzed when I look at my schedule, which leads me to shut down completely. Balance has been a life long struggle with me. I’m an all or nothing kind of girl :). Amen to this, my friend: “God and air is really the two life givers… use them both!”
I’m right there with you – with a full (and often busy) life. Starting the day with God has become a life line for me, but more than that, I’m trying to make sure the things on my calendar are there because God wants them there. Not all things I really want to do, but things I’ve reviewed with God before I’ve said ‘yes’. That’s helped turn ‘busy’ into ‘purposeful’.
I love the thought of turning busy into purposeful, Kathryn! When I spend my mornings with God, I definitely go over my schedule with Him too :). That makes a big difference. Now I just need to work on making this a daily habit!
Hi Candace! I think just about everyone can relate to feeling breathless and just ‘too busy’, whether in the head or on the calendar. I have found that my accident in January absolutely made my life come to a grinding halt…and I breathed. A lot! It was necessary. No one can make me feel overwhelmed except me, and I was really good at it too. Not a talent I am proud of…
I know that decluttering helps a lot of people, but for me, I need silence. I crave it. In that quiet I can reach the nutso part of me and ask God to soothe it for me. I need to make it a daily practice.
Wishing you air, air, air!
Ceil
Making myself feel overwhelmed is definitely a talent of mine as well, Ceil :). One I’m ready to finally break up with. I love quiet time too, but I don’t make it the priority it should be. Like you said, it really needs to be a daily treat.
Candace I love your helpful pointers – and I hope that I can crave God’s Word first thing rather than check my Twitter page! Also, I am in a position where I really want to stop eating food all the time… I would love to find out more about how you are working through your addictions! 🙂 Blessings! xoxo
You can check out the food addiction tab on the menu bar above, Ruth. The 31-day series was October of 2013. It worked really well, but when I added sugar back into my diet, I went back to bad eating again. The other series under that tab is called Turning to Food. I do a monthly update for that one and it’s still in progress. I hope those resources can help you. Let me know if you have any questions. I know how tough food addiction is. I’ve suffered from it for many years. Blessings to you as well!
Wonderful advice! Advice I need to follow, too.
Thanks, Akaleistar! I wish I could say I’m consistently following this advice, but I’m definitely a work in progress :).
I really needed to read this post today. I’m trying to set a new schedule for myself and these are some great tips. I really need to declutter and start leaving some food on my plate!
I hope you can stop by.
Colletta
I think we could all use a little decluttering, Colletta :). In so many areas… I hope this helped you today. Thanks for dropping by!
These very things are what have been helping me during a full season. I find myself savoring more the moments that make up the fullness. 🙂
Blessings to you, Candace.
xoxo
Savoring the moments sounds like such a dream, Beth! It’s something I’m definitely working on. Blessings to you as well, my friend.
Candace,
60 pounds ago, I knew I had a problem with overeating…I was an emotional eater. Carbs when I felt sad, crunchy snacks when I was angry or anxious…food was soothing. Having learned to channel a lot of these emotions back to God and finding other outlets has helped let go of clinging to food as a crutch. Now, if I eat out, I purposely only eat half of my entrée and take the other half home in a doggie bag for the next night. It’s been a slow process but if we take changes one step at a time…slowly we’ll get there. So glad to be linking up next to you at Holley’s linkup today!!
Blessings,
Bev
My family eats out way too much, Bev. It’s a big part of my food issue. I’m so excited that I have cooked the past 3 nights. It may be a record. I love that you bring half home. Restaurant servings are way too big for one meal.
Your advice to channel your emotions back to God is invaluable. I’m an emotional eater too, and it shows in my waistline. Blessings to you!
Our bodies and minds get so many things thrown at them, but it isn’t all good. We need to take time to breathe and appreciate what we have and where we are. Great post!
Thanks, Sarah! I so agree that we need to take time for appreciating all we have been blessed with. It’s too easy for me to focus on the negative. This is something I’m working hard to change, but old habits can be tough to break :).
You know I get this. Fully. Completely. I like your practical advice here that really does make a difference. Those verses from Matthew 11 from The Message that I shared on my blog today? Yep, that’s what I’ve needed in the midst of my full life lately. Thanks for encouraging well. xoxo
I know you do, my friend! One of the many reasons I’ve bonded with you, Kristin :). I loved that you shared those verses in The Message translation. I really want to read more of it. I love the ease of understanding it.
Good to have a moments peace to yourself for sure.
Absolutely, Gail! We too often overlook this need.
I especially love “leave food on your plate.” Great post!
That one is a work in progress for me, Christina. I’m still a clean plate girl at heart. I eat so fast, without even thinking. I guess my first step should really be to slow down some :).
Beautiful post Candace. I am in the same place as you where I continually have a full everything (day, plate, house). It is exhausting at times. My husband and I have been working on decluttering our lives and I think that’s one area where if we can do it, we will be able to take big deep breaths again.
Decluttering really helps us to breathe deep, Tiffany :). We purged a great deal of stuff at Christmas, but I have a long way to go still. I’m hoping to start round 2 as soon as possible!
What a wonderful post and such a timely reminder! Just yesterday I started the Simplify Bible Study by Bill Hybels – it’s such an eye-opener. Our lives can be so cluttered and I’m being more mindful about putting God first in everything.
Thanks for sharing (and for linking up to the #SHINEbloghop).
Wishing you a lovely day.
xoxo
That sounds like a fantastic study, Jennifer! I’ll have to check into it. Thanks for letting me know about it :).
Thank you for being so deeply honest. Our cluttered lives, and calendars, and plates and homes are squeezing us out of living our fullest lives. Busy has become the new catchphrase and we are all caught up in it. When I stopped identifying myself as busy, guess what? I stopped feeling so rushed I couldn’t see straight. We need to breathe, we need that morning time to get our spirits soaked in mystery. Bravo to all of this!
Thank you, Liesl! I love this and couldn’t agree more: “Busy has become the new catchphrase and we are all caught up in it.” For so long, I thought I was supposed to be busy. That meant I was accomplishing. Now I clearly see how wrong that thinking is.
I remember meeting a woman who carried her big, giant calendar with her everywhere. It was stuffed. There were papers sticking out in every direction. She was constantly in SPIN mode. She came to order tickets from me when I worked at a Box Office, and it was like she was completely dedicated to the idea of herself as being so important, and so needed in so many areas – she couldn’t see straight or lower her shoulders for one minute. She was a high speed mess.
She helped me see that sometimes it is me just wanting to feel Important and Necessary that makes me cram my calendar. I have places to be, but I’ve reduced the size of my calendar to a little purse size, that still can go with me for when I need to schedule the next Dental Appointment and we are at the Dentist Office, but I stopped writing down all my daily chores. I just made those habits, and stopped overwhelming myself with lists. Chores I can buzz through. Spending all that time making the CrazyList was what took me so long, and consumed my thoughts and made me feel so frazzled. Just my story – not necessarily anyone else’s.
My calendar is insanely large. I just got a new one with all kinds of different sections, etc. I was so excited about it, but now it’s a little overwhelming :). I love the idea of downsizing to something purse size. I may have to follow you on that with my next planner!
Thanks Candace! These are awesome tips. I need to practice the breathing and just pray. I am filled to the brim, girl! Thank you for encouraging me in this pursuit! Cheering you on from the #RaRalinkup on Purposeful Faith.
I’m so with you on being “filled to the brim,” Kelly! It’s a hard way to live in this constant state. Praying for you to find some breathing room! Your cheers are always appreciated, my friend.
This is wonderful advice. My life is also very busy at this stage and I need to find ways to make it manageable and not feel overwhelmed – and compensate for stress with things like overeating etc…
Some great thoughts here – thank you.
Thank you, Louise! I definitely overeat to deal with stress too. It has completely exhausted me at this point. My energy is at the lowest point ever.
I think prayer and deep breathing can help tremendously with those feelings of overwhelm. We get trapped in the busyness and really just need to stop everything at some points throughout the day.
Your words ring true with so many people, I am sure. We run hard and fast and stuff just a bit more into the schedule, all the while longing for a respite that truly feeds our souls.
I vividly remember sitting alone at the table after everyone left, pushing those horrid peas around and around on my plate as the tears rolled down my face. I rarely leave a single crumb on my plate now (but also love peas).
I try to declutter in small steps now, rather than an entire room. It does make a huge difference. I remind myself it didn’t happen overnight, and it won’t get resolved in a few hours either.
Great post. Thanks for sharing your practical and helpful tips!
I remember those tears and peas too, Karen. Except I still hate peas ;). That clean plate habit is a tough one to break.
Decluttering really does need to be taken one step at a time. I always let myself get too overwhelmed before I even start, just thinking about all that needs to be done. I’m hoping to start small this week!
Hi Candace, Life does get busy. I’m find that I can’t seem to get the things done, no matter how much time I set aside. Too many projects, not enough focus. Today is the day I will be rearranging my time and setting aside blocks for each thing. God is always at the top of the list. Loving your advice here.
Thanks, Kim. This: “Too many projects, not enough focus.” Yes! I have that same problem on a daily basis. I absolutely feel your pain and can completely relate. Going to God first in the morning before I confirm my schedule for the day is really helping to drop some of the less important projects :).
I continue to find space to breathe because I too am often overwhelmed by activities and obligations left and right.
Have a relaxing weekend!
Obligations are everywhere and so overwhelming, Lux! I completely understand. I hope you had a beautiful and relaxing weekend as well :).
I am loving your suggestions here. Life can be overwhelming and fast and then may go out of control! Phew!
Thank God for His faithfulness.
God Bless
Thank you, Ifeoma. Life really does spin out of control so quickly. God is truly our way out!